If you joined us last month for the introductory first part in this fun new series, then you know that I and a handful of blogging friends have started a new monthly post where we bring our husbands into the mix, really involve them in our blogging in a more visible way, and offer you a chance to get to know them better!
This month, we are delving deep into some interesting topics to find out what our husbands wish we knew about these things. I encourage y’all to jot down these questions or print them off and spark a conversation with your own husband this week! You’ll likely learn some very eye-opening things about what and how he thinks and you’ll be working towards cultivating more and more open communication in your marriage. It’s a win-win! 😉 If you would like to share the answers you received with us, leave them in the comments, leave us a link to your own blog post, tag us on IG, or however you want to do that! 🙂
So…..here we go!
What Do You Wish I Knew About…..
….what household tasks are most important to you?
Household sorting: it’s very important to me that everything in the house be in its proper place. It’s understandable when life with two kids causes toys to be scattered on the floor or play-doh to be all over the dining room table. But it is important to me to have everything organized according to its kind.
(Just to insert a side note here – I highly recommend that you ladies ask your husbands this question! I talk about this idea in this post and I’m passionate about it for two reasons – 1) It enables you to put your husband first and to take into consideration his needs, desires, and preferences in the home and 2) It lightens your load! Too often, we as homemakers get stressed out thinking we have to “do it all” all the time. But if, instead of thinking you have to accomplish every single household task there is all the time, you asked your husband what means the most to him – a hot meal waiting when he gets home, an organized and picked up living room, a clean bathroom, or whatever it is) and just focused primarily on that one thing, then it’s ok if time does not allow you to, that day, get to all the other tasks that need to be done at some point! You have checked off the list that which is most important to your man and then can address the other tasks as time and opportunity permit. And, truly, take the time to ask – don’t just assume you know his answer! I would have guessed that Owen’s answer would be something to do with a homemade meal, but it wasn’t! And, because he never nags me about household chores, I would never have realized that organization was actually the most important to him! So ask! 🙂 )
…sexual intimacy and why it’s so important for you?
Being frisky with your spouse is very healthy for a marriage with children. It relieves stress and grants wonderful feelings of endearment between man and wife. I also believe that God wants us to be sexually intimate with our spouses. And I do my best to honor my Heavenly Father’s wishes. Plus, I know that she likes it when I’m frisky!
Oh. My. Gracious. lol! Where is the hand over the eyes emoji when you need it?? Did I actually sign up for this post idea?? I didn’t know what I was getting myself into! Oh, mercy. But, in all seriousness, he’s right! Intimacy in marriage is SO important, especially in the busy season of having little ones when, if you’re not careful, your time and attention can easily be all taken up by your kiddos.
…your own space – when and why you need it?
I have a temper. And, as we all know, familiarity breeds contempt. Every once in a while, I need to get some alone time in order to vent so that I avoid venting on my wife and children. Plus, when I go to work, I design plumbing models according to someone else’s drawings. And, when I come home, I must do my best to minister to my children and tend to my wife’s needs. It is nice when I have time with devices that are my own (i.e. having lunch alone, playing a game, running, etc….).
Love my guy’s vulnerability and realness here! And I think this was an important and eye-opening question to have in the interview, because we talk all the time about the importance of self-care and mommy-time, and yet, when our guys need some time and space to themselves, as well, we sometimes suddenly take it personally and think it means they don’t love and enjoy us and the kids anymore! What’s with that??
…what refreshes you and speaks to your love language?
Privacy! When we had gone over a month without any kind of date, my wife surprised me when I got home from work with a note that said “I’ve planned a special day for us. We need it!!!” The spontaneity of it was also great!
Amen! I knew date nights and time alone was fun before we had any little ones and back when we just had one. But, boy, there is something about being the parents of kiddos plural now that really causes you to need that time alone! Thank the good Lord for doting grandparents in town who willingly watch the littles for us!
Another side note – his answer reveals that, at least in this season of life of littles, his “love language” is quality time. Interestingly, I think it has changed since having a second child, which shows that your love language and your needs can change based on what’s going on in your life. Because, when Owen took the love language quiz a while back, he scored highest in needing “words of affirmation” and now it seems to be more along the lines of “quality time”. Pretty interesting!
If you and your husband haven’t taken this quiz yet, do it! It will bless your relationship so much.
…your childhood home?
My childhood home was the perfect combination of indoor play space and outdoor exploration. My parents built a 2-story home with a walk-out basement and a walk-in attic. It sits on 1 acre of land that is right next door to my grandmother’s house and is in the middle of the 50-some acres of land that my grandmother owned. There was plenty of woods for exploration and imagination (not to mention the two horses that my grandmother had). There was so much for me and my siblings to do that, for the most part, we didn’t drive our parents crazy. My vision is to build out on that land, as well, and have that same landscape around our future home. Along with some cows and chickens to fill in gaps.
Loved this! It sounds so picturesque and fun!
To find out what my friends’ husbands had to say, go visit: