My dear friend, Amber Durgan, has been a guest on the podcast before, is also my co-author of our book, Friendship Matters, and is a previous guest-poster here on the blog, most recently just last Sunday in her beautiful Palm Sunday post . Today, I am delighted to have her joining us on the blog again, this time for the second part of her Holy Week series (be on the lookout for the final part in this series, which will release on Easter Sunday)!
In recent months, Amber has been learning about the power of the spiritual practice of gospel contemplation and of using your imagination to enter into a story from Scripture and thereby coming to a deeper understanding of it. May you come away inspired and equipped to do the same through Amber’s impactful words.
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We finally had him where we have wanted him for so long - hanging on a criminal’s cross, crucified. The crowds around me jeer and call out to him, “If you are the Son of God as you have said you are, then save yourself and come down from that cross!”
The air hung thick, a dark sky the background to this scene. I was there as they made him carry his cross out onto Skull Hill, there when they took the cold hammer and slammed his hands onto the wood, there as he cried out “Father forgive them, they know not what they do.” Now he gasps upon the cross, every breath harder than the last. It is loud, the crowds not letting up. We want to see another miracle - he must prove to us that he can save himself. Maybe then we will believe.
There is a small group off in the distance, comprised mostly of women, clutching each other and crying as if this man really was who he had claimed to be. The rest of his “followers”, as he called them - where are they? There is one man who looks to be one of them, but there were more. Even as we arrested him last night, there was a man called Peter and others besides. If it is true that this Jesus was their Lord, how could they abandon him in a moment like this? Have they discovered the error of their ways and turned their backs on their teacher? Will they now pay Rome the respect we are due?
Shortly after his cross was raised up, we divided his clothing out among us and drew lots for his robe.
This, was a quality made piece, surely not belonging to him but placed on him as he was paraded out here, by way of mockery. He wants to be a King, so we allowed him the chance to play pretend. Another soldier will walk away with the robe, me, I just have some of what belonged to him and I am not even sure what I will do with it…it feels almost like an affront to Caesar to keep it.
We have been out here in the dark for three hours; these men surely do not have long. One cannot sustain himself in a crucified position much longer than that. A muffled cry comes from Jesus’ lips, “I am thirsty”, so a fellow soldier dips a sponge in our sour wine and raises it up to him. As soon as he drinks, he says, “it is finished” and takes his last breath. He is dead. Gone. This so-called Savior of the world. We had to break the legs of the other two criminals so that they would die quicker, but this man, he had already passed.
I took a sword and forced it into his side - our lives and our livelihood depend upon making sure those we execute have truly died. As soon as his flesh tore open, both blood and water cascaded out. Clearly, he was dead. Our work here was finished.
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Reader, this was a hard post for me to write. It is not often we look at the crucifixion from this angle as Christians. Instead we take time to focus on the holy work Jesus accomplished on the cross. Other times we think about the women who accompanied Him to the cross. We may even think about John or where the other disciples were, but being “on the side” of the soldier in my imagination made me uncomfortable. I wanted to stop the soldiers from carrying out their cruelty and found myself wanting to shout at them that this really is the Son of God, King of Kings and Lord of Lords. “They know not what they do” was the cry of Jesus on the cross; writing this gave me a better feel for that prayer.
Today, on this good Friday, might I encourage you to think about those people in your life who have hurt you? We all have people who either intentionally or unintentionally have caused us pain. Would you take a moment to pray for them, even those who you might think knew full well what they were doing? They need Jesus just as much as the rest of us. Pray for their salvation and for forgiveness; pray that any bitterness you hold in your heart would be taken away. It is only through His sacrificial death this can be done.
Next, sit in contemplation over your own sins. Your sins held Jesus to the cross on this day nearly two thousand years ago. It’s a sobering thought. But do not stay there. Then ask for forgiveness and receive His free gift. Rejoice in the grace that has been given to you. Thank Him for the blood applied. You are His beloved. His child. The one worth dying for.
As we journey through this time before the resurrection, it can be helpful and good to take some time to ponder all His death on the cross means for us. He became our sacrificial lamb indeed.
Amen and Amen.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Amber is wife to Lance and homeschool momma to their two sweet little men. Her family resides in Montana, “where the mountains meet the prairie”. She has been blogging on and off since 2006 and has a passion to see women live into abundance through finding their worth and identity in Christ alone. To that end she has co-authored two books – Walk By The Spirit (January 2020) and Friendship Matters (December 2020).
